kdfjklsjfklsjdfkljsfklsdf.
i am so numb, yet im breaking.
i get tired and tired and tell myself that im through, that i cant take it anymore.
i feel alone and abandoned, and thats one thing, but when its our son its another.
its not fair to be selfish.
if you only knew, the most important thing you can give us is your time.
and that i do not have.
you give it to everyone but us.
i hate your pot smoking.
i hate your beer drinking on a daily basis.
i hate your constant leaving and staying gone for hours and never knowing when you will be back or where you'll be.
im tired of you smelling like beer.
i dont want to make love to somebody that's fucked up or spent the whole day gone hanging out with everyone but their family.
i hate it. i hate it.
every day, i am pushed further and further away but i still hang on.
but in the meantime, ill just keep crumbling inside.
ill keep waiting for you to realize whats most important.
ill keep waiting for you to grow up.
ill keep waiting for you to become unselfish.
ill keep waiting until i cant wait anymore.